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Be honest with your boss: After working for U.S. presidents, Jen Psaki has some advice to share

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Early in her career in 2006, Jen Psaki was asked by her boss, Rahm Emanuel, the tough-as-nails director of the U.S. Democratic Congressional Campaign, to call a New York Times reporter and pitch a story. She stopped in the washroom on her way back to her office and made the call only to learn Mr. Emanuel beat her to the punch.
After hanging up, she marched back into his office and told him: “Either you are the spokesperson for the campaign or I am. You decide and let me know.” As soon as she said it, she worried she had made a mistake. He was startled, but his response was mild. He nodded and said, “well, okay.”
Most advice about dealing with a boss is about being subtle, conscious of their moods, and offering advice deftly. But losing her cool had a surprising, confidence-building effect on Ms. Psaki, who went on to be President Joe Biden’s first press secretary and now is an MSNBC host. It also led to a breakthrough in her relationship with her hot-tempered boss; by confronting him she demonstrated she wasn’t scared of him.
She stresses that doesn’t mean you should rush into your boss’s office and give him or her a piece of your mind. But in Say More, her memoir and career advice book, she argues: “When working for direct people, being direct about your own point of view can earn you respect. Being a ‘yes-man’ doesn’t make you a valuable adviser. Figuring out when and how to provide the most candid and direct advice in the format and tone that works for your boss is what will make them look to you in a meeting and rely even more on your counsel.”
Working later for U.S. Secretary of State John Kerry, she got another lesson in directness. Her approach was to be gentle, downplaying criticism, mostly because of her own insecurities, lack of foreign affairs expertise and tendency to succumb to imposter syndrome.
But she watched one day after Mr. Kerry was too forceful in an answer on China and made a statement out of line with U.S. policy. His long-time aide, David Wade, afterward told the buoyant Mr. Kerry – who thought his comment had been terrific – “Sir, you just made a mistake up there. What were you thinking?” They immediately began to correct his error.
The incident stayed with her. Her boss had three Purple Hearts from his days in Vietnam. He could withstand flak from the enemy – and her. “Between people who trust each other, being direct is not disrespectful. To be effective at my job, I had to be able to tell people exactly what they needed to know as quickly as I could. There were times that required a gentler approach, but advising someone is not the same as appeasing them,” she writes.
During the negotiations in Vienna over a nuclear arms deal with Iran, Mr. Kerry planned to tell the world that a solution was near when it wasn’t. She ran after him as he went to meet the press. “That’s not credible,” she called out. “You can’t say that.”
It worked. He reined in his confidence and gave a more measured appraisal of the situation when briefing the media. Brusqueness worked in prepping him for such media sessions, to the point outsiders would remark on her approach. But she also found it useful to offer suggestions in the form of questions. “If you describe the meeting in that tone, you will be criticized for being warm towards a country with a weak human rights effort. Are you comfortable with that?” she might say.
When she met with Joe Biden and his wife about taking on the press secretary role, he asked some questions about how she viewed politics in the country and then Jill Biden asked whether Ms. Psaki had any questions for them.
She asked the essential question for an aide: “How can I work best with you?”
“We have been through a lot,” Jill Biden replied. “And we ask that you always be honest with us. Always tell us what is coming.”
Quick hits from Jen Psaki
Harvey Schachter is a Kingston-based writer specializing in management issues. He, along with Sheelagh Whittaker, former CEO of both EDS Canada and Cancom, are the authors of When Harvey Didn’t Meet Sheelagh: Emails on Leadership.

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